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Gratitude

[grat-i-tyood] Noun

the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

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I don’t think there are many that would say they weren’t grateful for having become a mother. I’m not sure there would be many that didn’t instinctively answer the question ‘What are you most grateful for?’ by saying ‘my child/children’. But if we think about this beyond just having had children, what else are we grateful for in motherhood? What/who else do we show gratitude towards.

I have huge appreciation for my husband and the role he plays in our family. Without him a) the children wouldn’t be here, and b) we wouldn’t have the lifestyle that we do. I am grateful for how hard he works to support us and even though his job is tough and it’s not always easy, he is always striving to be better and do a better job. And I know that he does it all for us, for his girls, whom he adores greatly. Without him, I would be lost. He is more than just the father of our children, more than just my husband. Rob is my best friend, he is my everything and nothing would be the same without him.

I am grateful for all my friends. The ones that listen to me moan when I’ve had a tough day. The ones that pick me up when I’ve had a terrible day, and the ones that laugh with me on a daily basis about the latest ridiculous saga that has occurred in motherhood. To the ones that have children and can relate, and to the ones that don’t and can help give perspective from another point of view. Without friends, motherhood would be a very lonely and scary place. With friends, it is manageable. They give me strength to carry on and to be the best mother I can for my girls.

I can appreciate bad choices, the ones that help me to realise a better way. The choices that build me and shape me and help me as a mother to make better choices next time. Having learnt from my choices, I will know next time, not to ask ‘what would you like for breakfast?’ but to instead ask ‘would you like toast or porridge?’ It’s these little things we say and do on a daily basis, that can effect us greatly in motherhood. Innocently ask an open ended question first thing in the morning and you could be setting yourself up for a long, tedious and exhausting day of toddler tantrums and impossible requests. I’m not saying that I have a breezy easy day because I offered a closed question, and believe me, my day could still end up full of toddler tantrum nightmares, but it’s a start and I have learnt the triggers and choices that I can alter to set myself up for (hopefully) a better day. And I grateful for this learnt knowledge.

And lastly, I am hugely grateful for my own mother. For her guidance and support, but also for the patience and love that she has shown me for my almost 31 years, without fail, always.

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I asked some other mothers, what they were grateful for in motherhood, Here’s what they had to say…

‘I’m grateful that motherhood led me to self employment which I absolutely love. If I hadn’t had children and wanted to work more flexibly around them, I don’t think I’d ever have taken the leap.’ – Josie Cornhill

‘One of the things I’m hugely grateful for is the support network we have of friends and family, whether that’s helping with childcare or being on the end of a phone when we’ve had a bad day or long night! I know it’s not a given for everyone which makes me even more grateful.’ -Hayley Jones

‘I’m grateful that motherhood gave me an escape from a work environment that was toxic and detrimental towards my mental health.’ -Sophie Durrans

‘I’m grateful that motherhood gave me a reason to find myself again. Not to just follow everyone else, but confidence to be who I wanted to be and do what I wanted to do. It gave me qualifications that I wouldn’t have thought about going into and the passion to achieve.’-Jade Staff

‘I’m grateful for the NHS particularly the midwives that delivered my children into this world safely. They made me feel like the strongest woman in the world when I felt the weakest, they are incredible and I’ll always be eternally grateful for the hours we shared in the delivery room together.’ -Care Johnson

‘Becoming a mum gave me more confidence and courage than ever as well as showing me how strong I can be. Our little boy might be star in the sky but he made me the person I am today.’  -Fran Jones

‘Gratitude for my own mother… until having children I had zero idea just how much she loved me and sacrificed for me! I don’t think you can really understand a mother’s love until you’re right there in it yourself.’ -Lauren Woolf

‘I am grateful that motherhood has helped me understand my own mother better and to forgive her for things I saw as wrong at the time when actually she was just doing her absolute best as most of us do.’ -Kate Holmes

‘I am grateful for those who stood by me at the school gate when I found it so hard to let go, The parents who shared the intensive care unit and their tears with me, the mothers and fathers who stood on the side of every football match, Karate session and scout pick up. We are all so different but we all share something so deep and profound – that love for our children that binds us inextricably together.’ -Becky Goddard-Hill

‘I am grateful for the way my maturing kids have taught me new things about the world. they open my eyes to a new way of thinking and I’m particularly thankful I now welcome them and embrace a new way of thinking thanks to them. Examples are veganism, diversity and equality.’  -Jen Stanbrook

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There is so much more that I could list- I think the important thing to remember is to show gratitude on a daily basis, not just when someone prompts you to consider it.

What are you grateful for today?